“Those who can soar to the highest heights can also plunge to the deepest depths, and the natures which enjoy most keenly are those which also suffer most sharply” L.M. Montgomery
I am back to quoting L.M. Montgomery today. I suspect most mothers of pubescent girls would find a strong affinity with these words and I am no different. Allison has always reminded me of Anne with her ability to feel things so sharply. It's hard not to love someone who so liberally expresses her joy in the world around her, but it can become wearisome to ride the waves of her emotions.
This morning started fine with sleepy hugs and preparing for school. But a couple wrong turns and I found her sobbing in the garage over her shoes (they had ants on them) as the bus came down the street. I managed to quickly remedy the shoe situation and barked at her to pull herself together quickly before she boarded the bus. I know I sound heartless but she has been ridiculed for her emotions before. Her fits of giddiness, her sensitivity to criticism and propensity for tears have been perceived as immaturity. And I used to agree. But now I believe they are just a part of her. A part she is working hard to suppress because she is finally aware that the world doesn't know what to do with someone who lives perpetually in the emotional moment.
It's moments like this that I appreciate my oldest son, who takes life in stride. His steadfast, easygoing personality does not show emotions easily. We have often wished he would show more excitement. Like on Christmas morning when the long awaited gift elicits no more than a wry grin and a comical comment. But I have come to appreciate the ease of knowing what to expect. Of not having to tread lightly.
There is much to love about them both. Strengths in the differences of their makings. But I suspect, I always have, that he will find the world an easier place to live in.
7 comments:
oh allison reminds me of a little friend of my daughter's. just a sweet emotional little boy who is happy and giddy and sad and upset back and forth all day. but it is just HIM. and he does get lots of weirdness about already, even at six. poor little guys. poor allison.
Niobe posted recently about her concern that her emotional range isn't very wide - that she DOESN'T feel things intensely and feels somehow detached from other people as a result.
LMM always insisted that she valued her emotional nature, though it's hard to share that feeling during the last few volumes of her journals when she is suffering so intensely over things that another person might have been able to shake off. It's a mixed blessing, that kind of nature.
I don't think there's a right or wrong way to be when it comes to emotional intensity - both natures have their strengths and drawbacks. (Yeow. How I hate those namby-pamby non-statements! But I stand by it - deep emotions are good; mellow emotions are good too.)
This sentence...
"But I suspect, I always have, that he will find the world an easier place to live in."
...is why my heart hurts for Jack. Because he, like Allison, will have a tough time if he continues to be so excruciatingly sensitive.
You know, BubTar is like Allison. And he's a boy. While we don't want to squelch that passionate, sensitive heart of him, I do hope we can temper it a bit, just so things won't be quite so difficult for him. It is hard to walk through the world with your emotions on your sleeve.
Ah! I forgot, there is a little something for you at my place.
Oh my goodness. These moments are so hard, and especially when they are off to school and you wonder the rest of the day how they recovered.
My son Max is very emotional, I must watch my tone, what I say, he is easily hurt by teachers, friends--just anything, so I understand. But my oldest son is pretty carefree and rolls with it--THANK GOD. Not that I mind the emotionality, but as you said, sometimes there simply isn't time..sadly.
it is hardto be so emotional in the world -it's hard to accept that. We don't want to deal with it. We don't know how. It scares us. And so, sadly, emotions get stuffed.
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